Rolton Haggis
contributed by Lord Fairgus
(with Webmaster's comments)

Stomach, heart, liver, kidneys and lungs o' a rolton
Salt
Black, white and cayenne pepper
Nutmeg
2 onions, chopped
6 ounces toasted oatmeal
1 pound beef suet
3/4 pint o' stock
ae few dram's o' uisgea, tae drink while cooking it

Wash the bairn's stomach wi' ae bit o' cauld water, turnin it inside oot, and scrapin weel.
Boil the heart, liver, kidneys and lungs until tender, hangin the windpipe o'er the edge o' the pan so it drains intae ae bowl (lovely picture, that). Ye cannae make these lungs intae pipes, sae dinnae bother tae fash yerself o'er how much it looks like ae nice set.
Mince meat verra finely and grate the liver (Throw the grater away). Add ae bit o' salt, pepper, nutmeg, onions, suet, an' oatmeal fer taste.
Mix weel wi' stock, and fill the sma' beasties stomach (the rolton's, not yours). Mak' sure tae leave room in the stomach fer the oatmeal tae (gag) swell.
Sew up, prick all o'er wi' ae sma needle and put intae boalin water fer three hours.
When done, place on ae hot plate, slit open, (resist the urge to throw it in the garbage,) and feast on th' finest tastin dish ae man can ken.